Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
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Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
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All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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