Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize