when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas