yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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