You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
