So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Never underestimate the power of titties
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
