Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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