"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
