I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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