you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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