New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize