OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me