I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
he thought i was a dude.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
