Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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