We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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