Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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