My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
