I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
