TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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