love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
