I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
they call him Oral-B. enough said
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
