fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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