Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize