I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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