I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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