she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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