Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
