You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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