hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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