You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
