I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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