I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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