Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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