he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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