I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
