I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
