I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize