we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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