ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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