Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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