Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
