are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
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