there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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