Do vagina's smell?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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