Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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