sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
