So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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