you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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