I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
