is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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