This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Randomize
