end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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